Posts Tagged ‘al gore’
Go give us a donation
|Traffic was backed up for miles, the police were going car to car. When they got to my car I asked the officer what was going on.He said “It’s Al Gore. He’s up there threatening to set himself on fire! We are going car to car collecting donations.””Donations!” I said, “How much you got so [...]
The whole world could be happy
|Bill Clinton, Hillary Ramrod Clinton, Al Gore, and Tipper Gore are flying aboard Air Force 1 on their way to visit the Communists to share their success stories about taxing Americans.Bill: “Why don’t I throw this hundred dollar bill out the window and make someone very happy.”Hillary: “Well, why don’t you throw ten hundred dollar [...]
Bad news and awful news
One morning Bill Clinton wakes up. He looks out side,it had snowed during the night and everything wascovered in snow. He looks down and sees somethingwritten in urine on the lawn it reads”I hope YoU GeT ImPeAcHeD”.Bill calls the FBI and says “Someone has written “Ihope you get impeached” in urine on my lawn. [...]
Bill Clinton and Al Gore go into a local diner for lunch…
Bill Clinton and Al Gore go into a local diner for lunch.As they read the menu the waitress comes over and askes Clinton,”Are you ready to order?”Clinton replies, “Yes, I’d like a quickie.””A quickie?!?” the waitress replies. “Sir, given the currentsituation of your personal life I don’t think that is a good idea.I’ll come [...]
The Perfect Day - Him and Her
The Perfect Day - Her 8:45 Wake up to hugs and kisses 9:00 5 lbs lighter on the scale 9:30 Light Breakfast 11:00 Sunbathe 12:30 Lunch with best friend at outdoor cafe 1:45 Shopping [...]
Pest-by-Modem
Pest-by-Modem Here’s how to be a pest-by-modem:*Make up fake acronyms. On-line veterans like to use abbreviations likeIMHO (in my humble opinion) and RTFM (read the f…… manual) to showthat they’re “hep” to the lingo. Make up your own that don’t stand foranything (SETO, BARL, CP30), use [...]
Campaign Slogans for George W
1. I’ll turn capital punishment into a new game show!2. I promise to get cocaine off our streets: 1 kilo at a time. 3. I’ll finish what Bill started — the interns.4. Like father, like son. You liked my dad, right?5. Vote for the GOP, Not OPP. 6. I promise no sex scandal: just look [...]
Bill Clinton, Bill Gates, and Al Gore crash
Bill Clinton, Bill Gates, and Al Gore were in an airplane that crashed. Now they’re in heaven, and God is sitting on the great golden throne. God addresses Al first. “Al, what do you believe in?” Al replies, “Well, I believe that the internal combustion Engine is the root of all evil and that we [...]
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