Posts Tagged ‘baseball’
A young man joined the Army and signed up with the paratroopers…
A young man joined the Army and signed up with the paratroopers. He wentthough the standard training, completed the practice jumps from higherand higher structures, and finally went to take his first jump from anairplane. The next day, he called home to his father to tell him thenews. “So, did you jump?” the father asked. [...]
Our next targets
Now that Uday & Qusay have been eliminated, a lot of the lesser-knownHussein family members are coming to the attention of Americanauthorities.Among the brothers:——————Sooflay …………………..the restauranteurGuday……………………. the half-Australian brotherHuray……………………. the sports fanaticBejay……………………..the gay brotherKuntay & Kintay…………….the twins from the African motherSayhay…………………….the baseball playerOjay………………………the stalker / murdererGulay……………………..the singer / entertainerEbay………………………the internet czarBiliray……………………the country music starEcksray……………………the radiologistPuray……………………..the [...]
President Clinton and his wife are at the first baseball game…
President Clinton and his wife are at the first baseball game of the season. At the start of the game the pitcher comes up in the stands and whispers something in Clinton’s ear. All of a sudden Clinton looks at Hillary and yells, “Okay, Hillary, GET OUT!”. She looks surprised but leaves. The pitcher looks [...]
Bill and Hillary are at the first baseball game of…
Bill and Hillary are at the first baseball game of the season. SuddenlyClinton grabs Hillary by thecollar and throws her over the side and onto the field. The stunnedumpire shouted, “No, Mr. President!I said, Throw the first PITCH!”
THE STATE OF THE UNION ADDRESS….THAT PRESIDENT CLINTON SHOULD HAVE GIVEN
THE STATE OF THE UNION ADDRESS….THAT PRESIDENT CLINTON SHOULD HAVE GIVEN “Members of Congress…People of America….I banged her. I banged her like a cheap gong. Which is not news, folks, because if you think Monica Lewinsky was the only skin flute player in my orchestra, you haven’t been paying attention. The only babes in D.C. [...]
Guyness Quiz
Guyness QuizTake This Scientific Quiz to Determine Your Guyness Quotient1. Alien beings from a highly advanced society visit the Earth, and you are the first human they encounter. As a token of intergalactic friendship, they present you with a small but incredibly sophisticated device that is capable of curing [...]
Three women were sitting at a bar having a few drinks…
Three women were sitting at a bar having a few drinks.After a while the conversation started turning a littlerude and crass. Soon the women were getting louder andthey were arguing about how wide their snatches were.(This happens all the time.) The first woman got up on the bar, lifted her leg,grabbed a baseball bat and [...]
WOMEN SPEAK IN ESTROGEN AND MEN LISTEN IN TESTOSTERONE
WOMEN SPEAK IN ESTROGEN AND MEN LISTEN IN TESTOSTERONE by Matt Groening RELATIONSHIPS: When a relationship ends, a woman will cry and pour her heart out to her girlfriends, and she will write a poem titled “All Men Are Idiots”. Then she will [...]
Men vs. Women
Men vs. Women Men and women are not alike. Sure, you thought you already knew that. But now we have conculsive proof! After countless hours of surveys and studies on the following topics, these facts have emerged: RELATIONSHIPS: First, a man does not call a [...]
A construction worker goes to the doctor and says…
A construction worker goes to the doctor and says, “Doc, I’m constipated.”The doctor examines him for a minute and then says, “Lean over the table.”The construction worker leans over the table, the doctor whacks him on the ass with a baseball bat, and then sends him into the bathroom.He comes out a few minutes later [...]