Posts Tagged ‘doi’
A husband with a computer addiction
|My Dear Husband,I am sending you this letter via this BBS communications thing, so that you will be sure to read it. Please forgive the deception, but I thought you should know what has been going on at home since your computer entered our lives TWO YEARS AGO. The children are doing well. Tommy is [...]
The technical geek test
|Are you a tehcnical geek?Do you have a problem with overdoing your technical activities? Many do. Take the following test to see if you are compulsive. If you can relate to 2 of the items, you may have a problem with Techno-Dweeb. If you relate to 3 or more, you are definitely a Techno-Dweeb. Do [...]
Instructions for Microsoft’s TV dinner
|You must first remove the plastic cover. By doing so you agree to accept and honor Microsoft rights to all TV dinners. You may not give anyone else a bite of your dinner (which would constitute an infringement of Microsoft’s rights). You may, however, let others smell and look at your dinner and are encouraged [...]
Fifty ways to be annoying in computer labs
|1. Log on, wait a sec, then get a frightened look on your face and scream “Oh my God! They’ve found me!” and bolt.2. Laugh uncontrollably for about 3 minutes & then suddenly stop and look suspiciously at everyone who looks at you.3. When your computer is turned off, complain to the monitor on duty [...]
Solution to the Y2K problem
|The government’s system administration team, working with computer manufacturers and experts in the computer industry, has found a lower cost alternative to address the Y2K (Year 2000) issue: The goal is to remove all computers from the desktop by December 31, 1999. In exchange for taking every computer, an Etch-A-Sketch will be issued to all [...]
Actual calls to technical support
|Computer novices may feel like they’re alone these days, but some of the following calls to IBM’s help center show there are plenty of people out there who still are inching onto the information superhighway.After a caller gave a technician her PC’s serial number, he scanned a database of registered users and responded, “I see [...]
Girlfriend 1.0 software
|Last year, my friend upgraded his GirlFriend 3.1 to GirlFriendPlus1.0 (marketing name: Fiancee1.0).Recently he upgraded Fiancee1.0 to Wife1.0, and it’s a memory hogger! It has taken all his space; and Wife1.0 must be running before he can do anything. Although he didn’t ask for them, Wife1.0 came with Plug-Ins such as MotherInLaw and BrotherInLaw. These [...]
Husband 1.0
|Last year a friend of mine upgraded from BoyFriend 1.0 to Husband 1.0 and found that it’s a memory hog, leaving very little system resources available for other applications.She is now noticing that Husband 1.0 is also spawning Child Processors which are further consuming valuable resources. No mention of this particular phenomena was included in [...]
The 25 BBS Commandments
|Thou shall love thy BBS with all thy heart and all thy bytes. Thou shalt remember thy name and password. Thou shalt only call a BBS two times a day. Honor thy SysOp. Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor’s password, nor his or her real name, computer, software, nor any other thing belonging to him [...]
Diary of a computer lamer
|July 18I just tried to connect to America online, which I’ve heard is the best online service I can get. I can’t connect, I don’t know what is wrong.July 19Some guy at the tech support center says my computer needs a modem. I don’t see why. He’s just trying to cheat me. How dumb does [...]