Posts Tagged ‘freak’
Getting in an accident
|A Rabbi and a Priest are driving one day and, by a freak accident, have a head-on collision with tremendous force. Both cars are totally demolished, but amazingly, neither of the clerics has a scratch on him.After they crawl out of their cars, the rabbi sees the priest’s collar and says, “So you’re a priest. [...]
Cat technical support problems
|This is an actual account by a worker at a technical support and service center. One particular customer had an old console-type machine with a print head that would ride back and forth on a spiral shaft. They also had a big bushy cat who liked to sit on the edge of the printer next [...]
New University Promos
New University Promos It was clear that one day the Ivy League would grow desperate. The the average tuition (per year) for each institution is outta site and they just aren’t getting enough applicants. I understand that in a rash, unprecedented move, some colleges are taking out advertising in the [...]
A girl goes to the doctor…
A girl goes to the doctor. She says, “Doc, I’m freakin’ out…I’m freakin’ out…my pee’s coming out in four streams.”He says, “Get up on the table and I’ll see what I can do.”She gets up on the table, and as he’s examining her, he starts to giggle.She says, “It’s not funny. My pee’s coming out [...]
Thank you for the emails
THANK YOUThank you to all my friends who sent me such important emails this year!It’s so wonderful that you included me in your quest to inform!Because of all of you I stopped drinking Coca-Cola after I found outfrom you that it’s good for removing toilet stains and rusting thearse out of 40-gallon drum.I stopped going [...]
There was a gorilla sitting in a tree by a river…
There was a gorilla sitting in a tree by a river, when a lioncame by for a cool drink. The gorilla thought to himself, “Howfunny would it be to screw the king of the jungle in the ass?”After a moment or two, the gorilla swung into action. He grabbedthe lion and started pumping away. The [...]
50 Ways To Annoy Osama bin Laden…
50 Ways To Annoy Osama bin Laden… Fifty Ways To Annoy Osama bin Laden If You’re Invited To A Dinner Party At His Secret Afghan Lair, by Alan MeissPoint out the lice in his beard to make him feel self-conscious. Pause for a moment, listen carefully, and say, “Doesn’t that sound a lot like a [...]
My Dog
Having a dog is great, it’s just the ‘dog people’ that freak me out. “Oh, look at her, she’s precious,just like Mommy.” Me?!? If I birthed something that had 8 nipples - it ain’t leaving the house.
Dude Gets Electrocuted and Burned Beyond Recognition
Some freak performs a science experiment pouring Hydrochloric Acid over a dead guy.
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