Posts Tagged ‘redneck’
A list of redneck computer terms
|Backup - What you do when you sight a skunk in the woods.Bar code - Them’s the fight’n rules down da local tavern.Bug - The reason you is a giv’n for calling in sick.Byte - What yer pit bull dun to cusin Jethro.Cache - Needed when you go to da store.Chip - Yer cusin’s uncle’s [...]
Catch a drunk driver
|Two rednecks, Bubba and Earl, were driving down the road drinking a couple of bottles of Bud.The passenger, Bubba, said “Lookey thar up ahead, Earl, it’s a police roadblock!! We’re gonna get busted fer drinkin’ these here beers!!””Don’t worry, Bubba,” Earl said. “We’ll just pull over and finish drinkin’ these beers then peel off the [...]
Fish cost a fortune
|Two Virginia rednecks go on a fishing trip. They rent all the equipment - the reels, the rods, the wading suits, the rowboat, the car, and even a cabin in the woods. I mean they spend a fortune!The first day they go fishing, but they don’t catch anything. The same thing happens on the second [...]
New scientific thoeries IV
New scientific thoeries1st RunnerUp- If an infinite number of rednecks riding in aninfinite number of pickup trucks fire an infinite number ofshotgun rounds at an infinite number of highway signs, they willeventually produce all the world’s great literary works in Braille.
Next US President
A redneck calles up the White House and tells the receptionist:”I’d like to become the next President of the United States.”The receptionist: “What are you, an idiot?”Redneck: “Why, is it required?”
Sexually active
A REDNECK BRINGS HIS DAUGHTER TO THE GYNOCOLOGIST FOR BIRTH CONTROL PILLS.THE DR. ASKS,”IS YOUR DAUGHTER SEXUALLY ACTIVE?”THE REDNECK SAYS,”NAW, SHE JUST LAYS THERE LIKE HER MOTHER.Sent by BOBBY
This redneck gets married, but on his wedding night…
This redneck gets married, but on his wedding night he doesn’t know whatto do. He’s fumbling around for a while, but finally his wife gets fed upand says, “Jeb, ya big idiot! Yer s’pposed to take that thing you playwith and put it where I pee!”…So he got his bowling bowl and threw it in [...]
A long-haired youth was hitchhiking through the deep South…
A long-haired youth was hitchhiking through the deep South.He got a ride from a mean-looking redneck trucker. Afterriding about 30 miles in silence, the youth finally said,”Well, aren’t you going to ask me?””Ask you what?”replied the trucker.”If I’m a boy or a girl,” answered the youth.”Don’t matter,” replied the trucker. “Gonna fuck ya anyway.”
What do true rednecks do on Halloween?
What do true rednecks do on Halloween? - Pump kin.
You might be a redneck if…
You might be a redneck if you check the mileage on your home.